I am MAD, beyond belief.

Jenn this one is for you. Remember before our trip & i said i had so much to say but not enough followers to get a discussion going so i wouldn't bother? Tonight I am beyond peeved so i am just going to spill. Most of you should know that my son lives with my grandma during the week. That is no secret & is in previous posts. I hate to say this, my family USE  to mean the world to me but honestly, most of them can KMA now, i could care less about them. I am tired of being used & abused, having them walk all over me & me always taking their shit. My grandma was the one person my whole life i could count on, i looked up to her like no other........until November.

I am going to say this whether i get flak or not, she is a bitch, with a capital B, there is no other way to put it honestly. So beginning of november she stopped letting me see austin any other time other than weekends, for the first time in his life, just to spite me, no matter what he thinks/feels. She puts me down every chance she gets to anyone who will listen, spews lies left right & center (100% lies seeing as i DO NOT speak to her @ all, i have stepped foot in her house a total of 1 time since then, that was too get addresses for the wedding, that is it) telling the rest of my family how horrible & mean i am, etc etc. I am standing firm & now i am the bitch. Whatever they can think what they want, they don't ask for the truth, instead believing her without knowing, so what do i care?

We went away last weekend, i asked for austin to come with us, i told her if she said no that i would not let her take him over the weekend to our family reunion that i am not going to (i have weekend care & control). I said in the email that i would leave the decision up to her but that if she tried to take him anyways she would be charged with a breach of court order, that i would hate to go that route but i refuse to continue to be walked all over (she has told me what to do for the last 10 years, used him as complete mind control only for me to recently find out she had NO control what i did with him on weekends what so ever). I let her know that i wanted austin to go to the reunion but that unfortunately if she said no then she made the choice. Harsh i am sure but it really has come to that, there is a lot i am leaving out, i am left with no choice but to be like this. Honest.

Today he phones me and asks me why he can't go, i was like um seriously? I said you don't even need to ask that you know why. My aunt who i don't even like is down from Toronto & he said they all want him to go, i said maybe she should have thought of that before. He hung up on me (for the first time ever). I sent him a fb message letting him know that i will not tolerate that behaviour & if he ever did that again he would be grounded a long, long time. There is no reason for it, i was NOT the one to make the choice, she was, and i am not backing down. Then this afternoon i get a call from my aunt, the one who i do not care for, i ignored it, she left a message asking me to call her. I will not do so. Why should i??? Does anyone care how i feel? NO, so why should i let them railroad me just because she is here from far away, she will be coming back here after the reunion so it is not like he won't still see her. She can't use the excuse of her son either because he will be here for the month of August.

I feel bad for him but i just can't, can't, can't back down on this, no matter what anyone says. If i do not take a stand i will continue to be walked all over, not going to happen. I am going to continue to ignore calls all week, i am too damn busy to be bothering myself with this. I am taking a moment to write this down then i am going to start supper, hubby will be home shortly & we have to run some heavy boxes to the house so i can unpack them tomorrow. My head is blown right now, i know they are going to pull something, but i am serious, the cops will be at her door, if my son is not here on friday night, my lawyer will be on it, on tuesday. This is not who i am, this is not what i do, but what choice do i have???????? I am so easy to please, i am extremely reasonable, she is completely pig headed  & refuses to compromise at all because she is not the one who thought of it. He had to BEG her to go to the circus cause that meant he got to see me 4 hours early. I mean crying for hours begging, for the damn circus which she was not taking him too.

She has ruined my dad & brother who are so lazy they refuse to do anything for themselves, all because of her. She babies austin too & got mad at me for teaching him how to do laundry. My brother will be 30 this year & she does EVERYTHING for him, laundry, cook, dishes etc that he does NOTHING. I asked him to help with dishes after i slaved over a meal that he came over for & he looked at me & said i don't do dishes. He USED to, he had his own place & looked after himself, UNTIL he moved in there. I can't let her do that to my son. My step mom left my dad because of this too, she will tell you that my gram ruined him, Cathy stopped doing his laundry & he said that is ok i will just take it to my mom, because my gram will do it, WTF is wrong with you woman? Seriously i think she is mentally ill or something.