I am so livid right now. I have mentioned before that my son lives with my grandma, she lives down the street from me. This woman who insists she has done it all for me (but wont give him back, ya for me? ok) is f***ing up his life. She lets him get away with EVERYTHING, and puts no responsibility on him therefore he can do what he wants. She will deny that but it is true. Among all the other things i have found out that she sweeps under the rug i bet she will sweep this under the rug too (after all she still lets him steal from her) he is selling cigarettes!!! i read his fb messages and i thought he was selling drugs after talking about the "stuff" but then i had a friend of mine today tell me she overheard the neighborhood kids talking about it not realising her window was open. I am LIVID!!! She has a tight rein on him when it comes to me but yet she can't control him what so ever. My brother caught him doing stuff he shouldnt be on fb last time but she blamed me and said i was spying and made him a new fb act. Dumb bitch, if she paid attention to what he was doing he wouldn't be as bad as he is.
He is only 12!!!!!! He steals, lies, etc etc etc. He has adhd on the severe form and he has major problems at school that she doesnt take care of. He hasn't brought homework home since grade 3 because she doesn't make him. His grades went from 80's-90's down to 60's-70's and lower. I can't confront him in it's entirety till sunday for purely selfish reasons, i won tickets to the circus on friday and i want to go, and wouldn't be able to if this came out right now, sat and sunday will be busy with wedding stuff so i don't want it to ruin my weekend. She won't do anything about it, i already know that.
Wow.. that's a tough situation. Can I ask why he doesn't live with you? Or why you don't insist on him living with you so that you can get a better handle on his life since it's evident she isn't doing it? Are you still his legal guardian? I really don't know the full situation since you haven't really talked about it before, but I think it might be wise to start the proper paperwork or whatever needs to be done so that he lives with you and not her. Grandparents are funny in a sense...they let the grandkids get away with tons of stuff that they wouldn't let their own children get away with. Now, with it being his great-grandmother.. I'm assuming this is the same in this situation.
ReplyDeleteGood luck!! Let us know how it turns out :)
Hey hun, you have some catching up to do, i have a post (the past) that explains about it some. I am in the process. I tried to do it without court but her response was that she was better off with her(don't know wtf she thinking) i think she just doesn't want to be without him and not that she can actually do it.
ReplyDeleteI had health issues (multiple surgeries), then i was going to school, i needed a solid plan before i went for him and now i have it. She has guardianship, i don't. I have weekend care & control. May is when i give my lawyer his retainer to get the ball rolling ( i do not want to interupt his schooling because he doesn't know this yet but i will be sending him to a better school next year)
the worst part J is she doesn't have the attitude most grandparents do, she actually turns her head to everything, chalking it up to boys being boys, he has done some pretty bad stuff that she ignores and gets mad when i tell her about it. Now it is just escalating. I love him, he is a really good kid in a lot of ways but his mental health issues make him have problems. He knows things are right or wrong but can't actually comprehend consequences and the "whys" and gets really upset when he gets in trouble.
ReplyDeleteDamn.. Im sorry I missed that post. Thanks for giving me a little background info. :) I hope everything went well with the surgeries.
ReplyDeleteDo you think her lack of discipline is due to her age as well?
I've known some ppl who, while their child (or grandchild) is getting into trouble, they just have this mentality that no matter what the kid does.. it really isn't that bad and other ppl are exaggerating the situation. It's ppl like that you just want to shake and be like.. "omg!! open your freakin eyes ppl!!" lol.
Then.. 10 yrs down the road when the kid is getting arrested for robbery the parent is all..'idk what happened? he's such a good boy... he's never had problems!' When, if the parent really opened their eyes, they would have seen the signs. It's sad, really. But at least you see the signs and are trying to correct the situation before it gets out of control. Good for you and good luck!! :)
http://sweetcanadian.blogspot.com/2011/01/flashback-past.html
ReplyDeletetheres the post, it doesn't say much but it does say some.
I don't think it is that, she knows what he does, she doesn't want to deal with it. Her age has alot to do with it i think. She very well knows exactly what he is up too, i tell her. She just brushes it off.
i was distracted with the last comment, i have told her about major things, she gives him "shit" tells him she is going to do something, then does opposite. Perfect example, last major thing was he was taking his lunch money and giving it away, i had a parent phone me and i got it back, he had given away at least $5, so there are 2 issues there, 1 that is like stealing, 2 he has no lunch. She told him she was going to go to the school in the mornings and put in his lunch order (she literally drives right past it on her way to work every morning) and then hands him money the next morning with a dont do that again. I then find out he is only pretending to buy his lunch from the vp. I no longer speak to my grandma so i don't know if she knows that but it just reinforces my point.
ReplyDeleteWell, it sounds like your hands are pretty much tied until you can get full custody again. That totally sucks, I'm sorry. I hope things work out. :(
ReplyDeleteya they are, good thing that i am patient lol, thanks J
ReplyDeleteHey! How's it going? Haven't seen a post from you in about 2 wks, just wanted to say hi.
ReplyDeleteHoly crap it does not feel so long, will explain in a post asap. My best friend has been down for 11 days, just went home today so new post soon. Thanks for checking up hun :)
ReplyDelete